Sometimes I wish....

Stuff that's been going on.......

Survived the freaking flu although I'm still eating soup and mushy stuff.  My stomach is still not happy.

I did it....I resigned!!  Don't know where I'm working next year but it won't be where I'm at and I don't even want to go back but I have to through May anyway. 

Next week get my cat's blood work back and he passes and let the process of getting far far away from here get serious!

The summer after my dad died, I had a really good friend who came over every day before lunch and we just left and went and did anything and everything.  I couldn't even tell you what we did except for this one day I will never forget.  Of course it involves a band.....don't all my best days?  We were shopping (our fave thing to do) when I saw a tweet from my fave band at the time that they were going to do a secret show that night for free and they'd give hints all day on twitter.  If you figured out where they were playing then show up.  Well if you know me then you know I know my music clubs/venues/hole in the walls around ATL. So I got it right away and because my friend was trying to keep me occupied at the time she agreed to go.  Got there early cause it did fill up and no one else could get in.  So I'm standing at the bar when this guy walks by me and I knew.....lead singer of this band I loved so much.  He looks at me and I look at him.  It is like you just know you're going to have this future that just keeps going on. It has.  

He's made my day/life at the time in so many ways.  We've spent this week talking all week and I know I whole lot more about him than I did.  Guess he is like me.....it takes a whole lot to get to know me.  I owe him big time and he knows it.  I've told him.  I was going through every day not feeling anything and then there was that secret show his band did and I snapped out of it and felt alive again.  Music will do that for you.  There was the time we were both in LA at the same time and it was raining which never happens in LA and he got kicked out of his motel room. :)  The Christmas I was in Little 5 and he tweeted in 30 minutes they were doing an acoustic show at Criminal Records that was being filmed.  The best thing was when he saw me and that smile he had and the hug I got.  The time Angel and Kevin and I went to who knows where in a not good part of town and I just will forever keep stuff that night to myself.  The night Clara and I road tripped to see them and we got tore up at the bar....him buying me tequila shots and me buying him jager shots. NYE show with Angel and Kevin with new music when he didn't even look like the same person.  The St. Patrick's Day show....oh my good gosh.  Wild night. Then the Macon show.  Way too much wine and tequila and singing our hearts out front row at the stage to our favorite song.  Guess that's the last time I saw them before they were just done.  Somehow that night ended in a graveyard in the middle of nowhere laying on some guy's grave I didn't even know.  Weird but fun times.  

The reason I'm thinking about all that is he actually made me miss the way things used to be.  Casual.  Not knowing how a day would end up or what would happen in it or with who.  When did we lose that?  When did everything have to be planned? When did you have to rehearse what you wanted to say and even wonder if you should say it? When did honesty become unexpected? When did we stop being able to just be ourselves? When did opening up to someone else become scary? When we got older?

I guess he made me miss innocent unplanned happiness this week.......

Sometimes I wish for that.......